I've been running at full tilt for so long that I just can't seem to stop. I've always been a strictly 8 hour's sleep a night person, but this year I've learned to survive on just six a night. I thought I was coping fine, but I finally realised it was just the momentum keeping me going.
On Monday, when I posted the wrong message to the wrong Yahoo group (a promo ad to a group that bans people for posting promos!) I suddenly realised that I'm not coping, and I'm headed for burn out. Even worse, that burn out will probably hit the moment I slow down - or in other words, as soon as I arrive at the RNA conference in July. As I don't want that, I'd better start taking things easy, starting right now!
I was told a year ago that one of the issues I need to deal with in my life is creating boundaries. Or in simple terms: learning to say 'no' to things. Over this past year I've learned to say 'no' quite well in my personal life, but it's something I still struggle with at work. How do you say 'no' to a boss who is paying you a salary you really need? I finally have the answer: you hit rock bottom and you just stop jumping when they say 'jump'. On Monday I was handed another project to do. I still have three open projects on my desk that need to be closed. I may not be able to say 'no', but this new project is going to sit in the inbox and wait it's turn. And if anyone has anything to say, they're about to discover the monster I can be when I'm sleep deprived.
So if you don't see me hanging out in Blogland, or I take a while to respond to emails, please forgive me.